THE FOUNDATION OF RELATIONSHIPS

THE FOUNDATION OF RELATIONSHIPS

THE FOUNDATION OF RELATIONSHIPS
By Randy Hyde, Ph.D.
 
The foundation of relationships is responsiveness. Human beings have an innate need for validation and connection. Research shows that quantity of interaction and responsiveness is more effective at building a relationship than even the quality of the interaction. The more a person reaches out to connect in a positive way, the stronger the relationship will be. When a person reaches out and is ignored, or brushed off, it hurts the person deeply and research shows it will be a while before that person reaches out again. Neglect is harder on a relationship than abuse. After the first four years of marriage, divorces often occur due to neglect — the relationship just dies. When people are dating they play, dream together, are highly affectionate, talk often and share deeply. If after marriage these things are neglected, the individual, the kids and the marriage suffers deeply. There needs to be a commitment to nourish and nurture the marital bond. A strong marriage is the foundation for the family. A couple may be inadequate as parents but the kids can often turn out well if the marriage is strong. Neglect usually doesn't occur due to meanness, but it occurs due to mindlessness. Taking a relationship for granted usually means the death of that relationship. My suggestion is be the most verbally and physically affectionate and responsive person you know.
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